Are there People in your life you’d like to Say No to?

There are many reasons for choosing Counselling and there are many benefits in doing so. Counselling gives us a chance to speak about things to someone in a safe and confidential space that is solely for your benefit.

When we have learnt to not express ourselves and not say what we need and how we feel about people, situations and events etc. then it is like going by unnoticed and somehow becoming invisible in our existence. Do you ever feel as if your life is mechanical and robotic and lacks energy and excitement? Do you feel as if you will not be able to manage another week, another as if your system is saying to you hold on a minute I cannot take any more ? Are your relationships suffering as a result and leaving you feeling as though there is either something fundamentally wrong with you or that others are out to get you ?

All of these things and more can be addressed through Professional therapy. If there are people in your life that you are finding it difficult if not impossible to say no to then exploring this can be healing and it does not have to take years at all! Often-times it is about not wanting to let others down or disappoint them and perhaps you feel that the other person will not be able to survive without your helping them. When we have learned from a child to put others’ needs before our own then this becomes a pattern and a way of being, it becomes a solid part of our identity. We can internalise a lot of Anger and become like a victim in these relationships or we can try to control so much to make sure that we never let others down because that would mean we are not a very nice person etc.

However, inside there is a part of you that knows that saying No is actually what you need to do and knows that by actually being able to do this will change so many things in your life like:

1. Give you a sense of your own real needs

2. Empower you to live your life

3. Discover what you really want to do with your life

4. Express your needs etc.

I work in a very intuitive and person centred way and draw on different approaches according to each individual I am working with however, throughout my practice what is important and what seems to work really well is working with the internal images and sensations that come up and are directly linked with specific experiences and events of our lives. I guess this can be what makes Counselling different with me rather then other more cognitive based therapists and I am influenced by many years of working through movement where I grew a deep appreciation of our bodies and our minds as a whole unit and when there are difficulties in one area this reflects or can be a result of the other.

So if you would like to start saying No to people or situations in your life then we might begin exploring this together in a very respectful and gentle way and through this process you will learn to listen and trust what your body is saying to you, what needs to be heard and healed……….. when the time is right for each person.

Karen April 15th 2019

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