I have heard many people lately say how they feel ‘out of sorts’, with a kind of depression but not sure if it is just them complaining and not being grateful for what they have. Its as if they know that seeking help in the form of therapy will help them but it feels indulgent to be doing so and what's more they have heard so many negative stories about therapists who have seemed to have missed the mark with either them or people they know.
If you are reading this and something is resonating inside then chances are that therapy is calling you now. So, how do you choose the right therapist for you? By going along to meet them and by listening, watching, feeling and responding to how you are in the interaction. If something feels off then try to verbalise it so you can get the clarity you need to either go ahead or decline and choose another therapist. Trust your initial sense.
Midlife is a time when change happens for many reasons for both men and women and some say that it is a time to connect with and realign with the inner wisdom that you have inside of you as oppose to journeying through the second half of your life fulfilling the wishes and desires of others or living according to the dictates of the society that crushes the vital life energy out of you.
Therapy can help you but it is important to acknowledge that it is not the same as picking up the latest self help book and gliding through the exercises. These books are good for giving enlightening snippets that can lift a depressive mood or change the energy in your body from a stuck one to a flowing one for example. However, in order for real change to happen it needs to be with that part of yourself that has been hidden away and that you are not even fully, consciously aware of, or you have not listened to for decades. Perhaps you have experiences of thinking you are crazy for having the thoughts and feelings that you have because they don't seem to fit into the life around you.
The feelings that flow through you, the ones you cannot quite hold onto long enough are golden keys to opening the door toward a more empowered and beautiful you. When we suppress and push down what we feel then the body compensates by holding all this energy inside. It shows itself in dis-ease and depression and illness for example.
It takes commitment to yourself to be in therapy and it can feel scary when change happens and when we go through changes ourselves but there is somewhere within you a deep river of awareness that is part of the universal rhythm of divine love. By putting yourself first in your life and rediscovering that diamond that you are you will be listening, watching, feeling and resonating to the earth, humanity and others.
Putting yourself first does not mean not caring for others, it does not mean dumping all your friends and separating from those who share your life, though for some it can be so. No, putting yourself first means switching on the love light and acknowledging the importance and pleasure of being you and living the life you deserve to live and the life you were born to live.